Black Summer bushfires left scars, concern for kids as fire season approaches

Despite winter ending just three weeks ago, I was at my desk writing on Wednesday afternoon when a co-worker put the alert to our team that a bushfire had broken out at Wallacia, to our north.

Simultaneously, we were already monitoring a bushfire to our south near Goulburn, then there were reports of fires breaking out around the Wingecaribee Shire, closer to home.

This was outside the numerous other Australian Community Media reports of fires breaking out in neighbouring regions.

I was living with my family in Batemans Bay during the deadly Black Summer bushfires, which is why I say "and just like that it felt like the world was burning again".

Everyone knows of some horror story from that time, but it can be hard to fathom the level of anxiety that hot windy days bring on for people from that stretch of coast.

Only a day earlier the Education Department had ordered 20 South Coast schools to close due to "extreme fire danger".

My 12-year-old son, who has profoundly special needs, attends a school in that region. My stomach dropped.

Since the 2019 bushfires our family dynamic has changed. I live and work in the Southern Highlands with our youngest son, and both of our boys travel between homes in Bowral and Batemans Bay.

Unless you were there during the 2019 bushfires I don't think it's easy to comprehend the impact of an event like that.

How a hot wind leaves goose bumps on your arms as you look to the sky and pray it's a harmless wind, not the kind that brings total bushfire devastation to everything it touches.

I coped with the 2019 fires by keeping my eyes on all that matters to me in this world. My children.

However, what happens if a bushfire breaks out and your kids are on the other side of it? That was where my mind went when the Education Department press statement hit my inbox.

These days my sons' dad lives to the south, I live to the north, and school for my oldest is somewhere in the middle.

So, when that email arrived my mind started running a movie of bushfire.

My son Frankie, surrounded by fire, and us trying to get to him.

It hasn't stopped running since.

Despite a cool-shift in the weather and all the fires within hours drive being contained.

I don't enjoy sharing these thoughts, but I think I might be experiencing something that many now share.

Call it PTSD or call it a memory.

However you slice it, my body is tense and I am back to feeling like Australia is going to burn again.

So I put my bushfire plan in place, I work with my now ex-husband to put plans in place for the safety of our beloved children, and I pray we never have to use them.

The problem is, having lived through 2019, I'm having a hard time convincing myself that those plans won't be needed.

Winter was just three weeks ago and this is what we're facing.

Given what summer might bring, we can only prepare now.

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